Tuesday, January 24, 2012

GOP Entrance Exam Answer Key

This is the answer Key for the GOP Entrance Exam; a 20 question quiz designed to see if you're worthy to call yourself a "patriotic American" and a "member" of the GOP.

Each question is worth 5 pts.

The bad news is, a "true patriot republican" already knows all these, or any answers, without being told. Deduct 10 pts. for even consulting an answer key. If you were forced to use the bonus question, also deduct another 5 pts. If you just said/lied to yourself  "well, I really didn't need to consult this answer key, I was only checking out of curiosity," congratulations give yourself back your lost 15 pts. and continue grading yourself.

Answers.
1. c.
2.d
3.d
4.d
5.d
6.c. He would never bomb his own bowels. Don't be silly.
7.d
8. c
9.d
10.d
11.d
12.d
13.d When in doubt you MUST blame Obama first, then do c.
14.c
15.d
16.c
17.a
18.b
19.d
20.d

Bonus Question: d.

Grade 100 to 125 pts. Congratulations! You've got what it takes! You're in the club!

90-100 pts. Technically you've failed this examination. Know that the GOP prides itself on a nearly impossible litmus test of ever changing, ever just out of reach "patriotic" purity. That you'd even grade yourself fairly and honestly bespeaks an amount of introspection and intellectual honesty the GOP tends to shun.

80-90 pts. Let's face it, the fact you didn't cheat, even the slightest bit says that you're not for us. You basically know the material but, you've displayed a disgusting amount of intellectual honesty here.

70-80 pts. You're pathetic. Not only are you honest, you didn't get the point. Obviously you're one of the many poor useful idiots we count on. You're not quite a republican at all, are you. No. You're a reactionary, poor member of the Tea Party.

70-0 pts. Seek ye the democratic party. LOSER! In fact you are SUCH  loser we suggest you click this link immediately for further assistance.

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